And sooooo the shit has hit the fan. I'm writing this super stressed out and lost in life. Shawn is going to quit. Susan wants to quit. And Peter is signing off. Basically my lucky ship of good fortune has hit a giant chunk of bullshit, gashing and puncturing the hull of my conciousness, flooding my life with a sea of misery, leaving me alone and shipwrecked, soul survivor adrfit in a dead calm of ennui. Kinda want to curl up into a ball and just let the world beat the crap out of me. Don't you ever feel that way?
I have fantasies of retreating to the Northwoods, taking up ceramics again, maybe abstract painting, bringing along poor old Dodo and going out in the afternoon on my boat to the Loon's Island and creating meaningless substance out of all that I've come to lose. What is art? What is life? What is meaning? I imagine the V of ducks coming for me.
But I wont. I will trek on and I will suceed. Its in my nature. I wont become what I most despise. And I'll be the stronger for it. Moving on, without them. Friends or not, I am the leader, and I will prevail.
Its just all so frightening, and more so frustrating.
2 comments:
just gotta keep it up. bound for glory.
also, nice couple of posts, i like the pictures! Thinking of you budday always.
Cole, beautiful photos as always. I am so amazed at how strong you stay out there despite the craziness that is PW@Sea.
Right now I'm working for an equity firm to catalog and research their collection; every Bon à Tirer Proof makes me think of you of you and Jon - out there at sea selling art to folks that will someday hire a land bound hooligan like myself to remind them of what exactly it is they collected all those years ago. Our paths are no longer the same, but serigraphy shall link us for always.
KISSES - stay strong.
-t
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